How to Deal with Ghosting in Online Dating - Family Map

How to Deal with Ghosting in Online Dating

Nowadays, online dating is the most common way of meeting new people. But along with this come new challenges. One of them is the dreaded "ghosting in online dating".

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Today, we're going to explore what it is, what to do when facing the ghosting in online datingto understand the possible reasons behind this behavior, how to deal with the emotional impact and ways to prevent it from happening in the future.

What is Ghosting?

Applications and websites such as Tinder, Bumble e Happn are known for connecting people from different places, making it possible to start relationships with just a few clicks. However, even with so many benefits, ghosting is a common occurrence.

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Image: Reproduction/ Tit Uol

The term "ghosting" comes from the word "ghost", meaning the act of disappearing from another person's life without leaving a trace or justification.

In the world of online dating, this happens when someone suddenly interrupts communication - whether through messages, calls or social networks.

How to Recognize Ghosting:

  1. Abrupt Contact Cut: The person stops responding without warning.
  2. No explanation: There is no justification or farewell message.
  3. Blocking: Sometimes ghosting includes blocking people on social networks and apps, making it difficult to contact them.

Although ghosting can also occur in friendships or even at work, it tends to have more of an emotional impact in romantic relationships, due to the expectations involved.

Why Do People Ghost?

As painful as it is, ghosting is not always malicious. There are various reasons why someone might disappear:

1. Loss of interestOften, the person simply loses interest and chooses to avoid the uncomfortable "break-up talk". This behavior is common when the initial connection doesn't deepen or when there are misaligned expectations.

2. Fear of confrontation: Some people find it difficult to deal with conflicts. For them, disappearing seems like an easier way to avoid an emotionally draining situation.

3. Social Anxiety: People who suffer from social anxiety can find it extremely difficult to end a relationship directly. Ghosting may seem less threatening to them.

4. Other prioritiesIn the world of online dating, it's common to chat with several people at the same time. When someone decides to invest in another connection, they can choose to disappear from other conversations without warning.

5. Personal problemsIssues such as stress, mental health problems or unexpected changes in life can also lead a person to suddenly isolate themselves.

The Emotional Impact of Ghosting

Being a victim of ghosting can be devastating, especially if you have invested time and feelings in the relationship. Abrupt silence can trigger intense emotions, such as:

Common feelings:

  • Rejection: It's easy to feel discarded or undervalued.
  • Confusion: Without explanations, you may wonder what went wrong.
  • Shaken self-esteem: Experience can make you doubt your own worth and question your actions.

How to deal with Ghosting

Overcoming ghosting isn't easy, but there are ways to lessen the impact and move on:

  • Accept Reality
    • Understand that the person has chosen to disappear and that you may never receive answers. As difficult as it may be, accepting this is the first step towards healing.
  • Don't blame yourself
    • Remember that ghosting is a reflection of the other person's behavior, not your value. You have no control over other people's actions.
  • Get it off your chest
    • Talk to friends or family about what happened. Sharing your feelings can bring comfort and new perspectives.
  • Avoid seeking contact
    • Resist the temptation to send messages or try to "stalk" the person online. This only prolongs the suffering and hinders the process of overcoming it.
  • Take care of yourself
    • Dedicate yourself to activities you love, such as exercising, reading or exploring new hobbies. This helps redirect your emotions towards something positive.
  • Consider Therapy
    • If ghosting has had a big emotional impact, seeking help from a therapist can be a great idea. They can offer you tools to deal with the situation in a healthy way.

How to Avoid Ghosting in the Future

Although you can't control the actions of others, there are measures that can reduce the chances of experiencing this again:

  1. Set Expectations at the Start: Be clear about what you expect from a relationship. This can avoid misunderstandings and create a solid foundation for the connection.
  2. Pay attention to the signsVague answers, excessive delay in responding or lack of interest can be signs that the person is not as involved as you are.
  3. Make roomLet the other person have their time and avoid pressuring them. This creates a lighter and more comfortable environment for both of you.
  4. Choose compatible partners: Invest in people who show emotional maturity and commitment. This reduces the likelihood of attitudes such as ghosting.
  5. Strengthen Your Self-Esteem: A solid self-esteem helps you cope better with any situation. In addition, confident people attract healthier relationships.

Por que as pessoas somem em encontros online?

Imagem: Reprodução/ Forbes

Desaparecer de uma conversa ou de um relacionamento online pode parecer um ato cruel, mas acontece mais vezes do que gostaríamos de admitir. Muitas vezes, isso acontece porque as pessoas têm medo de enfrentar uma situação que seja desconfortável para elas.

Em vez de dizer diretamente que perderam o interesse ou que não veem futuro na relação, elas preferem evitar o constrangimento e simplesmente somem.

Outra razão comum é a dificuldade em se comunicar de forma aberta. Nem todo mundo sabe como expressar o que está sentindo de fato, especialmente quando envolve rejeitar alguém.

E, com a facilidade de simplesmente parar de responder, algumas pessoas escolhem essa saída, achando que será menos doloroso para o outro lado.

A cultura digital e o sumiço nos encontros online

Na era digital, tudo acontece tão rápido que, muitas vezes, as conexões humanas e reais acabam se tornando descartáveis. Nos aplicativos de encontros, onde há sempre uma nova opção a um clique de distância, o desapego se torna quase natural.

Se algo não está indo bem, ao invés de tentar resolver, muitas pessoas simplesmente passam para a próxima pessoa.

Além disso, o fato de a comunicação ser virtual diminui a necessidade de enfrentar o outro pessoalmente. Isso pode tornar mais fácil para alguém desaparecer, já que não precisa lidar diretamente com as emoções que a situação pode causar para a outra pessoas envolvida.

Outra questão é o anonimato relativo que a internet oferece. Quando interagimos online, é fácil sentir que não há muitas consequências para as nossas ações, fazendo com que o comportamento de sumir sem dar satisfação se torne mais comum do que imaginamos.

Como saber se você está sendo ignorado em encontros online

Perceber que alguém está sumindo pode ser doloroso, mas há alguns sinais que podem te ajudar a identificar isso antes que se torne algo definitivo.

Um dos primeiros sinais é quando a pessoa começa a responder menos ou com menos frequência do que o costume. Se antes as mensagens eram frequentes e agora demoram horas ou dias para serem respondidas, isso pode indicar que o interesse está diminuindo aos poucos.

Outro sinal é quando as respostas se tornam curtas e genéricas, sem o mesmo entusiasmo ou profundidade de antes. Se antes havia troca de ideias, e agora parece que a conversa está ficando morna, pode ser um indício de que a pessoa está se afastando.

Além disso, quando a pessoa evita fazer planos futuros ou não demonstra interesse em continuar o contato, é um forte indicativo de que algo mudou.

E se você perceber que a pessoa simplesmente para de responder sem nenhuma explicação, infelizmente, é um sinal claro de que você está sendo ignorado.

Identificar esses sinais pode ajudar você a lidar melhor com a situação, o que evita expectativas que podem não acontecer de fato.

Conclusion

Image: Reproduction/ Terra

O ghosting in online dating is a challenging experience that can leave emotional scars, but it is also a learning opportunity.

By accepting the situation, seeking support and investing in yourself, you can overcome this adversity and grow even stronger.

Use this experience as a springboard for building healthier and more meaningful relationships in the future. And above all, trust that the best is yet to come.

Written by
Melissa Viana

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